3 Circles

 

You can't stop the waves, but you can learn how to surf .

(Jon Kobat Zin)

Related to this advice. I remember Sabrang or Noe said: at least we should understand 3 circles in life. The first is in our power circle (Lingkaran pengaruh), the second is only cares circle (Lingkaran Peduli), and the third is only look circle (Lingkaran Perhatian). 

After my monday class, again, I felt so disappointed in myself. I didn't do anything wrong. It's only because of my expectations for myself. I want to be calmer. But, ya. I am just being too cheerful and looks like I can't be serious. 

I want to talk with my friend, Hera. But I know the answer actually will be the same. Hera will tell me " it's OK, as long as you didn't do something bad to others. Being a cheerful person isn't something wrong. And if there is anyone who feels uncomfortable with your personality, it's not because you are bad. It's only because it does not match. " 

I remember exactly what Hera said. So, I keep thinking about it, and try to solve my problem. 

This story is my reason to write about this topic. About 3 circles. 

The only thing in our hand is ourselves, right? We can control our feelings, we can control our reaction. Even though maybe we need time to do it wisely. But we can. When I thought " Maybe, people have a bad interpretation of me because of my attitude. Just like kids."

I have no power about what other people think. And maybe it's just my overthinking. I also can't force anyone to think like I want. But, I could do one thing. I can control my mind and try to change myself step by step. If I want to be calm, I just have to try to be calm. And don't even do it because I want people to see me as a calm person. It will be worse. And I can't put my purpose focus only on what other people think. And the important thing is I should not try to pretend to be other people. Just be myself, and try to be the best of my version. 

For the second circle, sabrang gave an analogy. If we decide to be passengers of the online ojek, we certainly can't join to drive the motorcycle. The only thing we can do is say something if there is something that's wrong. For example, the driver drives too fast. We can say, "please be careful. And don't to fast" but, we can't join to drive the motorcycle with the driver. It will be more dangerous.

And the last, is the only look circle. If we read bad news in the newspaper about corruption, of course, we will feel angry and sad. But we are even getting angry for a week. The situation will not change to become better. We can't be apathetic. But we should be realistic. For now, what exactly can we do? Maybe try to build our integrity. And try to build a good community. Then we can make a change, at least in our close area.

Sometimes I just think that maybe I should explain about myself. About my job. About my capabilities. About the good things that I have done. But I feel it's not important at all. And looks more childish. And I asked myself. Why should I do that? Am I in a job interview situation? 

We can't stop the waves,

The problem is part of life. We need problems as well to grow up.

But we can learn how to surf.

 Life without problems is impossible. Learn how to face it, it is the only thing that makes sense.

Ah... 03.48 p.m now. I'll post it later. Fighting!